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How Two Lovers Would Quarrel in the Dragonball Z Universe
by Phil


 

"I love you, honey."

"I love you too."

"And I also love that you love me."

"Ha. But I love that you love that I love you. My love is incomparable to yours."

"..."

"What is it, dear?"

"I have a confession to make, sweetie. Some time ago, I realized that I could surpass your love level. I've been training in secret... and 3 months ago, I finally surpassed you. I now love that you love that I love that you love that I love you."

"B-B-But... that's impossible! It cannot be! That's an abstract level of love that nobody should be able to attain."

"But it's true, honey bunches. I have reached the next level in loving you."

"Lemme turn on my scouter... Holy fuckbucket! Your love level is at 500,000! You couldn't have that level of love unless... unless you were a SUPER SEXY! Yes, you are as the prophets have foretold! I cannot believe it!"
(Stands wide-eyed, mouth gaping in shock and disbelief for 5 minutes.)

"Don't get too excited, creampuffs, you know what the doctors said about your heart condition."

(Takes deep breath.)
"OK, I'm calm now. But now that I think about, something is different about you. Yes, this explains why your hair is all golden and spiky and why your body radiates light."

"What? You didn't notice that? I've been that way for 3 months now."

"I thought you got a perm or something. How was I supposed to know?"
(pause)
"Um, would you mind turning your hair off so I can sleep?"

"Sure, meatmuffin."
 
 

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